Last month, KVOE reported on the death of noted sexual assault survivor and victim advocate Daisy Coleman and how her passing had sparked additional conversations on the topic of support for sexual assault victims.
At that time, the question was “are we doing enough” to support those who suffered at the hands of others. Now, a month later, a new question has arisen, are possibly trying to do too much?
During KVOE’s Talk of Emporia Friday, local experts were asked the question is there too much pressure placed on victims of sexual assault to share their stories? While none of the experts definitively said yes or no, they did warn it is a possibility that cannot be ignored.
Beacon for Hope Suicide Prevention Executive Director Melissa Owen says it is not uncommon following the death of a noted advocate for individuals who supported or looked up to them feel a need to take up the mantle.
SOS Assistant Director of Crisis Services TinaRae Scott says it is important for people to speak up as it can provide some comfort or inspiration to others who are still coming to terms with their trauma. However, Scott says while victims should always feel safe, secure and supported in sharing their stories, they should never feel it is their obligation or responsibility to do so.
Scott says pressuring a victim into speaking out before they’re ready is an issue of power and control.
Crosswinds Counseling and Wellness Development Manager Lucas Moody says while reliving trauma can help provide closure for some, it can be a form of continuous revictimization for others. Moody says the ultimate goal of any advocate or resource is to ensure victims can move on and live a healthy, happy and full life regardless of whether they want to step into a spotlight with their story or not.
Scott noted that television and media often portray individuals who assist sexual assault victims as “white knights” who push them and encourage them to stand up and speak out. She says this portrayal of a “support system” is a dangerous one as it can give non-victims a sense that it is their responsibility to push a victim into the spotlight regardless of whether or not that is what they want to do.
These actions can, in turn, lead individuals to take on the burdens and struggles of others while they themselves are still working to be made whole.
If you or someone you know has been the victim of sexual or domestic violence or may be contemplating suicide, there are a number of resources available to assist. This includes SOS, Beacon for Hope and Crosswinds.
If you, or an individual you know, would like more information on suicide prevention or resources available for victims of sexual assault please contact Crosswinds Counseling and Wellness by calling 620-343-2211, SOS Services at 800-825-1295 or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
